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Women Inspire Women: Life Lessons from Judge Mablean, Part II

Is your life out of balance? Need to recheck your values?  As West Angeles’ featured speaker on Mother’s Day 2018,  Judge Mablean Ephriam shares Part II of her inspiring life principles (read Part I HERE).  Based on her 2 books, Look Deep Before You Leap and Judge Mablean’s Life Lessons: Tools for Weekly Living, her presentation is gleaned from recurring themes discerned during her “40 years of legal experience, 20 years of television experience, and 60+ years of life.”

Ms. Ephriam spoke candidly about trials she’s faced in her own life, and covered topics such as marriage and divorce, parenting, giving, and finding a healthy life balance.

As Women’s History Month 2019 comes to an end, we’re sharing our favorite quotes from Part II below:

Life Lessons From Judge Mablean – Forget fashion: it’s the heart that counts.

ON VALUES: “It’s not about Gucci and red-bottomed shoes.”

“Get past the style and the fashion.  It’s all about the heart.”

“Some women are just so covetous; they’ve forgotten the 10th commandment.  They want it all, but they don’t want to do anything to earn it.”

“You want a man with money, but what do you have to offer him? All you have is a lot of clothes and a whole lot of debt.   A man wants a woman with something to offer too; they don’t want a woman with a credit score of 200!”

“A man wants a woman who can budget and who can spend money wisely; someone who’s not all about Gucci and red-bottomed shoes…”

“Take a lesson from Bishop Blake and Lady Mae. They didn’t always have it.  Her husband wasn’t rich, but she saw his heart, and she worked with him and helped him.”  

“Live within your means.”

ON LIFE BALANCE: “Get healthy; have time for yourself.”

“We think we’re superwomen. We’re not.”

“You have to get healthy; have time for yourself.  The Bible says, ‘Love thy neighbor as thyself.’”

“Your tired, you’re grumpy, you’re really mad. Then your husband says, ‘I don’t want to be here’.  Proverbs 25:24 says that it’s “better to live in a corner of the roof than in a house shared with a contentious woman.”

“Too often when children come into a relationship, the children have priority.  That’s not biblical. The Bible says that a man is to cleave to his wife and become one flesh. Your children don’t have preeminence over your husband. You have to have balance.”

“When you’re taking care of your children, allow your husband to be a part of your children’s lives. I’ve heard women say, “I can’t leave him at home to babysit those kids”…He’s not babysitting: he’s their father.”

Children deserve both mother and father taking care of them and nurturing them and providing for them.”

“Share responsibilities. Draw closer to God; spend time with Him.  Balance your life.”

Click this image to give to the West Angeles Family Life Center Campaign today.

ON GIVING: “God didn’t save you just for you.”

“The Bible says, ‘When you give, give cheerfully.’  That’s not just about your money that’s your time your talent, your gifts.  Whatever you give: if you don’t give it willingly, then God doesn’t honor it.”

“It’s not always money that God is giving you.  Good health, a right mind, ability to walk, the use of all your limbs as He designed: the older you get, you realize that you can’t take [these things] for granted.”

“Long life, friends, people who love you: that comes from giving, when you give from the heart.”

“God didn’t save you just for you.  He saved you so that, through you, He could save other people.”

“The moment He said, ‘Ask in my name,’ you’re representing Him.”

ON DIVORCE: “You have to forgive.”

“Don’t walk around with unforgiveness and iniquity in your heart. Spiritually, you will not go where you’re supposed to.”

“If you’re mad that you didn’t get what you’re supposed to get [in the divorce], then go through the proper legal channels to get what you’re supposed to get.”

“Divorce your husband, not your children.  And don’t force your children to divorce their father. Don’t use your children as the pawns in your divorce game.  They are entitled to love and have a relationship with their father.”

“When I found that “tall dark and handsome”, nobody could tell me anything: my mama couldn’t tell me, my elder sisters and brothers couldn’t tell me.  Nobody could tell me, and I was going to marry that man.”

“Don’t start calling him all kinds of names.  Remember: you chose him! You decided to marry him!”

“When you tell your children what a terrible person he is, what does that say about you?”

“The Bible says, ‘Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamor, and evil speaking, be put away from you.’   You have to forgive if you want to be forgiven.”

ON STARTING A NEW LIFE: “Just ask God.”

“Divorce is not death; you are not the 1st to go through one.  It can be a new beginning; a new life, a new lifestyle: like it was for me.  I got [the show] “Divorce Court” as soon as my divorce was final: how about that? Look at God!  Does He have a sense of humor?”

“You know you wanted to go to school, but you had babies early. So, now that you’re divorced, go to school.  Get that college education.”

“My mother had 9 children, but she also always wanted an education…So, my mother went to Jefferson adult school and got her GED.  Then, she went to LA Tradetech and got her nursing certificate. You can’t give up because of circumstances in life.”

“Use your time wisely. Just ask God.” west angeles logo

Mablean Deloris EphriamEsq. is a long-time West Angeles member.  She is a former Los Angeles prosecuting attorney and the author of 2 books, Look Deep Before You Leap and Judge Mablean’s Life Lessons: Tools for Weekly Living. Judge Mablean is best known as the adjudicator of the courtroom series Divorce Court for seven seasons. She started her law career as a corrections officer in the Women’s Division of the Federal Bureau of Prisons. She attended night classes at Whittier Law School earning her Juris Doctor degree in 1978.  In 1982, she opened her own law practice. Ephriam also portrays a stern judge character in Tyler Perry’s Madea films.  Judge Mablean was previously married to Cassius Paxton.  They have 1 daughter, writer/director/producer Tajamika Paxton.  To learn more about her books, please CLICK HERE.

SCRIPTURAL REFERENCES: Genesis 2:24, Exodus 20:17, 1 Samuel 16:7, Proverbs 4:23, 13:11, 23:24; Matthew 6:21, Matthew 22:39, Luke 6:38, John 14:15-21, Ephesians 5:31, 2 Corinthians 6:14, 9:7; Galatians 5:22-23.

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